Friday, September 08, 2006

Burglar strangled by nurse.

Dateline Portland, OR---Talk about strange news stories, this one is unusual! Emergency room nurse, Susan Kuhnhausen, 51, returned home from work to find Edward Dalton Haffey, 59 burglarizing her dwelling. Haffey, who was armed with a hammer was quickly strangled to death by Kuhnhausen using only her bare hands! Kuhnhausen is a hefty gal who outweighed the five foot nine 180 pound crook by some 80 pounds.

Police have determined that Kuhnhausen used reasonable force and her actions were justified. The dead man was a career criminal with a long history. Kuhnhausen surpassed even the legendary Nurse Rached from the Cuckoo’s Nest!

Crimefile salutes Kuhnhausen for being one spunky old gal!

Update! That was no simple burglar! The cops say that dead guy was a hit man hired by Susan Kuhnhausen's estranged husban to kill her! Read about it here.


Anonymous said...

Hey don't evey make a woman angy who just got home and needs to pee!

Anonymous said...

Can you imagine what her patients will be thinking.

"Is that bed pan too cold?"

"Nnnnnooo maaaammm. My teeeeth alwaaays ccccchatter lllike tthisss."

Anonymous said...

A big shot attorney had to spend a couple of days in the hospital. He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just like he did his staff. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to do with him.

The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him, but finally even she had enough. She came into his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature."

After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down, crossed his arms and opened his mouth. "No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated, "but for this reading, I can't use an oral thermometer." This started another round of complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared his behind. After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce, "I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!"

She leaves the door to his room open on her way out. He curses under his breath as he hears people walking past his door, laughing. After a half hour, the man's doctor comes into the room.

"What's going on here?" asked the doctor.

Angrily, the man answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"

After a pause, the doctor confesses, "Not with a carnation."