A DUI will bleed you between nine grand and twenty-five grand before you can even say, “But officer, I’m fine.” Insurance spikes, legal fees, towing, storage, DUI school, and the privilege of walking everywhere like some medieval peasant. And yes, it can cost you your job. Employers love reliability, not “Sorry, boss, my license is in jail.”
Here is how it happens. The more booze you pour down your throat, the more convinced you become that you are Mario Andretti with a cape. After enough drinks you are basically Superman without the x-ray vision, the flying, or the common sense.
Back in my early police days in the late 60s and early 70s, DUI enforcement was about as common as a snowstorm in Phoenix. Unless someone was dead or mangled, nobody bothered. The arrest process was a bureaucratic nightmare and bosses didn’t want cops tied up for an entire shift babysitting one sloshed idiot. So the carnage piled up, and eventually society said, “Maybe we should stop letting drunks turn cars into guided missiles.”
Now DUI enforcement is a priority, and for good reason. If you drink anything, or if you are high on perfectly legal meds, driving is a surefire way to screw up. You will drift. You will swerve. You will make mistakes you cannot charm, joke, or sweet-talk your way out of.
You have Uber. You have friends. You have taxis. Hell, you can crawl home if you must. It is a minor inconvenience that saves you a mountain of cash, a lifetime of regret, or a trip to the morgue.
They say you can’t fix stupid but they can absolutely give it a court date and a bill you will never forget.
Comments