I recently had a case where a client was charged with stealing a car from Avis. He thought it was a brilliant idea to represent himself. Newsflash: representing yourself in court is like doing your own brain surgery. It is messy, painful, and almost always ends badly.
This nonsense isn’t new. Remember Hertz? I somehow recalled a little “oops” moment where they reported cars stolen that were, in fact, rented. One poor guy, just a tourist in Vegas, got the full Las Vegas moment sans the wedding chapel ceremony. Instead of meeting Elvis he met Cops at gunpoint, face in the asphalt and a vacation memory he’ll never forget!
I decided to dig deeper using ChatGPT, and what I found was staggering. This wasn’t one mistake. It was practically company policy. Clerical errors and garbage software kept flagging people as thieves. Cars were being re-rented while the original renters were being slapped with criminal charges. Lives ruined, vacations destroyed, and plenty of mugshots taken for the scrapbook.
The lawsuits piled up so high that Hertz had to file bankruptcy just to crawl out from under the judgments. You would think that would be a wake-up call. Instead, the rental car giants doubled down and kept doing the same reckless garbage, like a gambler who can’t stop feeding quarters into a broken slot machine.
Meanwhile, the LAPD and prosecutors acted like they had never heard of this fiasco. My client may not have had a lawyer, but he was lucky enough to have me as his criminal defense investigator. After a few more court appearances and a lot of truth shoved in the right faces, he got his life back.
So here’s the free advice: if you rent a car, treat the return like a crime scene. Photograph everything. Video the car, the odometer, the gas gauge, even the coffee stain on the seat. Get a nice clear shot of the employee who takes your keys. Hell, ask them to smile for the camera. Because one day, that footage may be the only thing standing between you and a jail cell.
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