Cheating today? Kid, you picked the worst century for it.
It’s Valentine’s Day 2026. The city is full of roses, lies, and people who think they’re invisible. They’re not.
Back in the old days, you needed a private investigator. A guy like me. Someone with patience, your generous retainer, a camera, and a tolerance for human stupidity.
Today? Now you just need an iPhone and a spouse who’s done pretending.
AirTags and other more sophisticated devices update location history in real time. Your car practically confesses before you even get home.
You can talk about the law if it makes you feel better.
But the truth is, nobody gives a rat’s ass about legal fine print when betrayal is on the table. They want answers, and technology hands it to them like a bartender sliding whiskey across the counter.
Community property state? That vehicle is half theirs. Which means your little midnight detours are happening in shared property, legally tracked in real time, with timestamps that don’t lie.
Your phone is a witness. Your car is an informant. And you? You’re just another guy thinking he’s clever.
Best advice? Keep your pants closed. Go home. Don’t get castrated by today’s technology.
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