Ah, technology, the modern miracle that lets us talk to anyone on the planet, post our lunch online, and document our own downfall in high definition. With a single swipe, we can send a message to someone halfway around the globe or ruin our lives in record time. Privacy? Who needs that anymore? Apparently not the geniuses who think their phones are invisible to law enforcement.
Every call you make leaves a digital fingerprint. Sure, what you say isn’t saved unless someone records it, but the fact that you called, when you called, and how long you talked stays forever. And text messages? Those are like tattoos on the Internet’s hide, permanent, embarrassing, and often regretted.
There’s an old saying among cops: You can’t cure stupid, but you can give it a court date. And that’s never been truer than it is today. The vast majority of criminals are walking, talking IQ tests that they keep failing. If they could get what they wanted without committing a crime, they’d still break the law just to prove how brilliant they aren’t.
Say it isn’t so. Modern crooks text each other their criminal master plans, film their crimes like it’s a Hollywood audition, and then livestream the evidence. They might as well call the cops first and say, “Tune in at 8!”
More and more crimes aren’t solved by detectives pounding the pavement, but by officers with a search warrant and a Wi-Fi connection. The new crime lab isn’t the forensics unit, it’s the cloud. And the award for dumbest accomplice goes to the smartphone, because it never lies, never forgets, and always snitches.
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